Letting go of rules |

Two Meals or Three?
Letting Go of Diet Rules

For a long time, fasting gave me certainty.

Clear windows.
Clear boundaries.
Clear proof that I was “doing it right.”

I’d grown accustomed to eating once or twice a day, often skipping breakfast and having an early dinner. For years, this rhythm felt manageable — even empowering.

But as I transitioned away from keto and into a starch-based way of eating, a new question emerged:

Do I need to eat more often now?

And beneath that question was a deeper fear:

What if eating more often makes everything unravel?

My history with fasting

Fasting wasn’t just a tool for me — it became a language of discipline.

It quieted appetite.
It reduced food decisions.
It offered structure when life felt full.

And in many ways, it worked.

But over time, fasting also trained my nervous system to associate hunger with virtue and fullness with risk.

That’s not something we talk about enough.

Why I didn’t force breakfast

When I began increasing carbohydrates, I didn’t rush to add breakfast just because I “should”.

Instead, I listened.

Some mornings, I genuinely wasn’t hungry.
Other mornings, I noticed a gentle pull toward food — not urgency, not panic — just a signal.

I didn’t want to replace one rigid rule with another.

So I chose flexibility:

breakfast when hunger was present
no guilt when it wasn’t
no forcing either way

That choice alone lowered my stress more than any macro adjustment ever had.

Experimenting with meal timing

What surprised me was how my body responded when I gave it permission.

Some days, two meals felt grounding.
Other days, three smaller meals felt steadier.

There was no “best” number.

What mattered was:

stable energy
calm digestion
absence of urgency

This was new territory — because it required responsiveness, not control.

Honouring hunger without panic

For women who’ve relied on fasting, hunger can feel threatening.

It’s easy to interpret it as:

a sign of failure
loss of metabolic control
something that must be pushed through

But hunger is not an emergency.

It’s information.

Learning to honour hunger without panic was one of the most important nervous system shifts I made.

Sometimes that meant eating earlier.
Sometimes it meant eating a little more.
Sometimes it meant trusting that hunger would pass naturally.

Each time I responded calmly, my body learned something new:

I will be fed. I don’t need to escalate.

Why this matters for women

Women’s bodies — especially in midlife — are exquisitely sensitive to stress.

Rigid fasting schedules can:

elevate cortisol
disrupt sleep
increase food anxiety
blunt natural hunger cues

This doesn’t mean fasting is wrong.

It means fasting must remain optional, not compulsory.